Pizmo Beach at Last!

On the road- this stop- Florida's Treasure Coast- Miami, Coral Gables, Boca Raton, Hanging Gardens of Babylon, Bal Harbour, Naples. Ok you may say- that's NOT quite right. Correct- Naples is on the Western side of Florida. Nice looking out. Truth be told I do not know exactly WHERE the Hanging Gardens of Babylon are but IF they are in Florida- the Garmin will find it. This trip is all about learning things. Some of them suck. But...if I have not experienced them by now- it's long past time I learned them and though I may NOT be as flexible as I was in my younger days I have enough grace to admit "my bad" and move on.

Things I have learned:

The GPS will not prevent you from getting lost- it will just prevent you from getting irretrievably lost. You may need to go 328 miles out of your way to get back where you want to go, but you will get there. And thanks to the Garmin- you know JUST how late you will be when you get there. The Garmin also is like a single minded 6 year old. Say you want to go to a shopping center on the left- and it is directing you- IF you take the entrance NOT recommended by the Garmin it will continue to redirect and recalculate and babble on until you chuck it onto the car floor and say "I HAVE reached my destination- clam UP!".

Important: If you drive home in the dark, turn the headlights on (the control is on the right side of the steering column-no, NOT the windshield wipers the headlights LOW beams please...) MORE important: When you arrive at your destination and have finished chucking the Garmin on the floor and kvetching at it, please shut OFF the same headlights before leaving the car. Because if you do not the grouchy man who comes to give your battery a jump in the morning will charge you $15 a MINUTE to do so. He will also ask humiliatingly direct and obvious questions like- "Left the lights on all night didja?" and " Got a meeting or something?" As I am the only woman in south Florida in pantyhose and I am clutching my datebook and Treo while tapping my foot- the only appropriate answer is a wan smile in lieu of say... kicking him.

And if you are all dressed up- hose, heels, skirt, (NEW skirt) Even though the phone is ringing while you are texting and you have one hand digging in your purse for your keys and your sunglasses are slightly askew for the love of God DO NOT try and walk from the parked car to the shade because.... you will fall in a hole in the sidewalk- the kind of hole which inevitably presents itself in situations just like this. And it will not be a level one fall (you hit your knees) or a level 2 fall (you hit your elbows) it will be a level 3.5 fall(hit FACE on the pavement and spill contents of your purse for 18" in every direction. The only thing worse would be level 4-(doing all of the above while carrying liquid i.e. a cup of coffee)

After repairing from the fall- a trip back to the hotel, change of pantyhose and a hello kitty bandaid (that was what the lady at the desk HAD- fortunately covered up by the skirt) I got a call from my boss- I updated him on my trip and then told him about my fall. "And what did we learn?" he said. "Don't walk, text and chew gum" I asked. He said "No...try doing ONE thing at a time, hmmm?"

I never thought of that.

:)X